There is a HUGE difference between defending someone and taking someone’s side. I love you and all, but for once…maybe you should just man up and admit you are wrong. I know that’s hard for you, but you’re wrong. If you are going to get all mad and bitch at me for defending someone who has been nothing but an absolute sweetheart to me than don’t talk to me.
I’m not perfect and I’m never gonna be. You say you always kiss ass and you’re the one holding this friendship together, well maybe its true and maybe it’s not.
Nobody truely knows, but us and well… we both have our own sides of the story.
Of course I’ve tried to be there for you as much as I possibly can. I’m sorry if I’m not there for one day. That shouldn’t change anything and if it does, maybe we weren’t as close as I thought.
But truth is, you haven’t been there for me as much as you thought. I’ve been through hell and back, alone.
My sister ran away and you saw me crying my eyes out at school and you just looked at me in the hallways. But when you finally started talking to me, you promised after that you’d always be there for me. But guess what? You left. After that, I felt like you’d never be there for me again.
Not to long after, my dad was hospitalized for about 5 months. I didn’t have anyone. My boyfriend at the time wasn’t talking to me. My sister was gone. You weren’t here. And I couldn’t talk to anyone in my family about it because I had to act like I was okay and be strong for them. I couldn’t do it anymore. I called my cousin, who was over seas at the time, and told him my dad looked dead. He couldn’t have gotten on a plane and come home fast enough. Ever since that day, Brandon and I have had a special relationship.
But you know what? My dad doesn’t give up. He is a fighter. He fought through a 50-50 surgery and made it. He fought through being the sickest patient ever at the hospital and survived. He fought his heart stopping and not working. He now has a mechanical heart, a pace maker and prostetic leg. My dad has to plug himself into the wall everynight so that his heart doesn’t give out on him in the middle of the night while he’s sleeping. He is plugged into batteries so he can survive each and every day.
When his dad died, I thought he was gonna commit suicide. Where were you? Not here. My grandpa was my life. Now he is gone. I go to bed every night scared I’m going to lose my dad and wake up hoping he is still okay.
You have NO IDEA what it’s like being me. You have no idea what shit I’ve gone through. Sure I may I have told you about it, but it doesn’t affect you like it has affected me.
I had to see my dad dying on a hospital bed and my grandpa in a coffin. I saw my dad cry when my sister left and it broke me.
I’m sick of faking a smile, so please, let me apologize for not being there one time. Maybe, sometimes, the girl who is always there for everyone else…just needs someone to be there for her.